If you’re female, within days of your 50th birthday the Government of Ontario sends you two gifts in the mail. The first is a breast cancer screening letter, advising that now that you are officially ancient (my words, not theirs) you must have your boobs flattened into pancakes by a machine every two years.
October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month and although a mammogram is not exactly a pleasant process, it’s worth going through a bit of pain to make sure you are cancer free.
The second gift from the government (which I assume men over 50 also receive) was a letter about swiping a blob of poo on a slide not once, but three different times, during a 10 day period. This colon cancer kit included three slides and what looked like a couple of really long Popsicle sticks. According to the instructions, participants should put the wooden stick in the toilet to scoop out some poo and then smear it onto the slide and yeah… just yuck! Continue reading “Pancake Boobs and Poo Slides”→
When last we saw the inhabitants of Station House No. 4, Julia and William Murdoch had suffered a tragic loss, George Crabtree found himself unlucky in love again and viewers were left wondering what Violet Hart, Julia’s new morgue assistant, was really up to.
Season 12, Episode 1 begins with Julia (Hélène Joy) and William (Yannick Bisson) walking into their brand new home only to find about a dozen people inside. The home was designed, incidentally, by legendary architect Frank Lloyd Wright (Aaron Poole) and, as it turns out, Julia didn’t read the fine print (who ever does?!) in the contract before she signed it and has agreed that Wright can use their house as a showcase for 90 days.
Season 4, episode 15 begins with Morgan’s group trapped on the hospital roof, mainly because the writers thought Morgan was the only one who could lead them. When Wendell asks why “Mo Mo” is standing far away from them, Jimbo says what many of us are thinking: “What the hell are you waiting for him to do? He got us into this. You’re on your own now.”
Morgan obviously blames himself for becoming the leader and leading his people into what looks like an unwinnable situation, but really Morgan, don’t blame yourself, blame the showrunners for foisting this role upon you.
Fortunately, the whole episode doesn’t just focus on Morgan and we get to one of the highlights of the episode, Alicia calling out to Strand and John, who are across the water, then hearing June on the walkie and telling her John is safe.
Charlie and Alicia go into town to search for a boat or a canoe (any type of watercraft that can float) so they can rescue their friends.
Meanwhile, Jim continues to whine, which makes me wonder why Morgan, Wendell or Sarah are avoiding the inevitable and don’t just stick a pole through his head.
Alicia and Charlie spot a canoe and suddenly Martha starts shooting at them. Alicia sees she’s bleeding and offers to help, but of course this one trick pony replies with: “I don’t need any help,” and falls to the ground. As Alicia approaches her, gun drawn, Charlie says: “It’s the woman on the walkie.” Why thanks, Captain Obvious. Continue reading “Fear The Walking Dead Recap – I Lose People”→
Fear The Walking Dead’s ratings are plummeting like a stone, or like many stones, collapsing after a dam explosion. The previous showrunners had no idea how prescient their season 3 finale was, as the current showrunners blow Fear apart piece by piece.
The first quarter hour of season 4, episode 14 is a flashback to the story of the Filthy Woman, who now has a name, Martha. Is there anyone else out there who doesn’t care about Martha’s backstory, not to mention how weakly written it was? I just want this ludicrous character to go away. I would rather find out what happened to Daniel Salazar after the dam explosion. But he had nothing to do with Scott M. Gimple and his minions’ (Andrew Chambliss and Ian Goldberg) distorted and cavalier vision of what they thought this season of Fear should be, so I assume we’ll never see him again.
Last night’s episode was another waste of time, with Morgan’s crew trapped inside a zombie filled hospital, and Alicia trying to get Charlie to a beach (why she’s doing her brother’s murderer any favours, is beyond me).
With fall looming, cooler temperatures will be ushered in and all our favourite (and not-so-favourite) TV shows return! So grab a pumpkin spice latte, or ice-cap or whatever it is you enjoy (personally, I like a good pumpkin pie vape liquid) and get ready to hibernate. Here is a list of fall TV premieres in Canada, with commentary, when warranted. If you don’t agree with me, or I’m missing your favourite show on my list, please feel free to comment and let me know!
Wednesday, September 12:
American Horror Story – Apocalypse – (FX Canada)
Season 8 is being described as a combination between season 1 and season 3. If it’s anywhere near as good as season 7 – Cult or season 5 – Hotel was, then viewers will be in for a deliciously horror filled fall season.
Friday, September 14 Norm Macdonald Has a Show (Netflix Canada) BoJack Horseman (Netflix Canada)
Tuesday, September 18 This Hour Has 22 Minutes (CBC)
This half hour comedy is a Canadian staple that guarantees weekly laughs as they send up Canadian and American politicians alike. I’m waiting with bated breath to see their take on Ontario’s newly-elected bully-in-charge Doug Ford.
Wednesday, September 19 I Feel Bad(2-part episode) (Global)
I Feel Bad looks quirky and funny. It’s also produced by Amy Poehler, which is a plus in my books! I’ll definitely be tuning into this one.
Thursday, Sept. 20 Dragons’ Den (CBC)
Sunday, Sept. 23 Anne With an E (CBC)
Like there haven’t been enough Anne of Green Gables TV series – thanks but I’ll pass. 9-1-1 (Part 1) (Global)
I generally don’t like cop shows, and the ads with Jennifer Love-Hewitt front and center, sticking out her huge boobs, doesn’t exactly help either .
Monday, September 24
Murdoch Mysteries– (CBC)
This is a cop show I make an exception for – it takes place in the early 1900’s and is filmed all over Southwestern Ontario. Murdoch Mysteries is full of drama and even some comedic moments, not to mention Yannick Bisson is definitely easy on the eyes.
In this week’s Season 4 episode (13) of Fear The Walking Dead, we finally meet Sarah and Wendell’s “Polar Bear,” but before we get to him, Morgan, June and Al are searching for Quinn, who we know has turned into a zombie.
Morgan talks to Sarah on the walkie, telling her to wait for them while they look. “What the hell is this, an airport shuttle?” Sarah says, just before she heads into the woods when they hear a walker. As Jim and Wendell wait for her, a walker approaches and we find out Wendell has a kick-ass button on the arm of his wheelchair, he pushes it and it releases spikes out the back, which efficiently skewers the walker.
Still calling for Quinn, they get a moaning, walker’s voice in return. Then the filthy woman on the walkie says she helped him “become what he was meant to be.” Morgan recognizes her voice. She tells him if he keeps leaving the boxes at the mileposts, she is going to come after him to make him “strong again”.
Then we cut to the best characters currently on this show, Victor Strand and John Dorie, who, after the hurricane, are now stranded on a ranger station. They have supplies, but as a disappointed Victor points out, no booze. John is building a raft out of logs because he wants to get off the station to find June. Victor doesn’t particularly feel like leaving, especially when they see an alligator waiting to ambush them in the water near the shore they are trying to get to. Continue reading “Fear The Walking Dead – Recap – BlackJack”→
Jim Carrey returns to television after a 24 year absence in the new Showtime comedy/drama, Kidding. Carrey plays Jeff Pickles, the successful host of Mr. Pickles Puppet Time, a PBS children’s show that’s been on the air for 30 years.
The series begins with Jeff making an appearance on the Conan O’Brien Show. Danny Trejo is already on the guest couch, sporting a large, gaudy gold and diamond necklace that says P-Hound. Jeff innocently asks him what the P stands for. Trejo tries to come up with a G-rated answer. “It’s like a ladies…” he says, hesitating. “Is it her purse?” Jeff asks. “Yes, purse,” Trejo replies.
Jeff sits down and pulls out an instrument. Conan asks what it is. Trejo answers him: “Come on, everyone knows UkeLarry.” Jeff dedicates the song he is about to play to his wife and he starts singing. Trejo and the entire audience sing along. It’s obvious Mr. Pickles is beloved by the American public. Continue reading “Kidding – Season 1, Episode 1 – Green Means Go – Recap”→
I’m still not sure if my baby finger is broken or just badly bruised but I twisted it pretty badly on a GO Train door between rail cars yesterday. I was headed downtown with my friend Nikki to see Hugh Jackman at the Toronto International Film Festival (TIFF) yesterday.
Today, I still have no idea what the extent of the damage is. I can tell you one thing, though – as swollen as my finger got yesterday, there wasn’t a chance in hell I was missing the Red Carpet Premiere of Hugh Jackman’s new movie The Frontrunner at Ryerson Theatre yesterday.
A Smile And A Wink
Was it worth a swollen finger in the end? Hugh arrived just as the movie was starting and headed inside. I was a little worried it was all for naught, but as he passed me and the other people (mainly women) I’d been waiting with all afternoon, he waved at us and said “Don’t worry, I’m coming back out.”
He spent a lot of time with the crowd once he returned, autographing items and posing for pictures. As soon as I got a wink and smile from Hugh after I’d thanked him for autographing the picture I’d brought, the throbbing in my finger magically disappeared!
Of course the pain has returned today, with a vengeance. But, a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do and to meet and talk with Hugh Jackman again this year was worth the price of a damaged pinky.
The Frontrunner is the story of American Senator Gary Hart’s presidential campaign in 1988. His campaign was destroyed when he was caught cheating on his wife. It opens in theaters on November 21.
One thing I love about the temperature getting a bit cooler is being able to put the oven on bake without turning my whole house into a blast furnace. The changeover to Fall will also usher in an abundance of squash available at local grocery stores and farmer’s markets. Spaghetti squash is a favourite of mine, with its slightly sweet flavour. It is also high in fiber and low in calories. This squash is non-starchy and has yellow flesh, unlike it’s Butternut and Acorn squash cousins.
An awesome replacement for pasta when you’re counting calories (42 calories per cup, compared with spaghetti noodles at about 210 calories per cup), Spaghetti Squash has a stringy texture and is also packed with B-vitamins, vitamin C, manganese and potassium. Its peak season is October through March, but I buy it and bake it almost all year round.
Weak is a fitting title for the entire run of Fear The Walking Dead Season 4 so far, although Episode 12 – entitled Weak, while not particularly strong, isn’t predominantly weak either.
June and Althea are going nowhere fast. The hurricane has left them stranded. Al’s SWAT van has run out of diesel, they have no food and water and Al is getting sick. But not all hope is lost, as they hear someone coming through on their walkie-talkie. The problem is, the voice is not recognizable due to all the static and feedback.
At the beginning of the episode, and before we realize just how dire Al and June’s situation really is, June is watching John Dorie’s (Garret Dillahunt) video interview, where he talks about how he is certain he will find his “Laura”. She watches the video over and over again and talks to him on the walkie-talkie, receiving no reply. Could it be John’s staticky voice she and Al end up hearing? Will June and John finally be reunited? Continue reading “Fear The Walking Dead Recap – Weak”→